Stafford Opens Up

We put them on a pedestal and tear athletes down just as quickly these days, depending on what school they play for or what colors they choose to wear.  What we often forget about is that they are still young women who, in fact, we as fans, media, or even coaches know little about.

I had the opportunity to talk with the new Longhorn OH Torrey Stafford this afternoon, and very little of it had much to do with volleyball.  I reached out because selfishly, I wanted to apologize to her for our site messing up and leaking the news of her entering the Transfer Portal this past December and also selfishly because I wanted to capture a "breaking news story" about her transfer and new home so it would boost the popularity of my website.

Luckily, only one of those happened.  I apologized to the Jr All-American about our mess-up and that it was a poor accident that I regret.  Also, that is not what we are about as a company, so though I can't take it back, I felt bad for letting the news out before she was ready.  Torrey was great about it and explained it did upset her, but she appreciated me apologizing to her, which meant a lot.  But there would be no breaking story to boost our subscribers, and in hindsight, I'm so glad.  Instead, what I learned about a pretty impressive young lady (who people tell me is a very good volleyball player also) who is simply trying to navigate this whole thing called "life" just like I am, and you are and so are 1000s of others playing college athletics and news flash it's not easy. 

Stafford is enjoying her time in Austin and settling into her new surroundings, but she's not ready mentally to talk about everything else because" it's a lot."  Oftentimes, I truly appreciate my lack of volleyball IQ because I don't have to fake like I'm an expert of the sport.  Instead, I get to simply talk to athletes about themselves as pretty cool human beings, and we skip all the volleyball jargon for another interview. 

That is what this talk with Torrey ended up being.  Just a couple of people dealing with life's ups and downs (one of us is a world-class volleyball player and one isn't).  Stafford never wanted to talk about awards, honors, or stats.  She talked about growing up and learning to advocate for herself (because it's much easier to be a people pleaser than to "speak up and truly make Torrey happy"), and she talked about the closeness she feels with her new teammates, especially those in her position group (Probably the deepest and most talented in America) "It's crazy here how we all coach each other up in the practice gym and you also see that amongst the other position groups.  I think that is what makes this team special."  I asked what her group is like because I have talked about how close Cari Spears and Abby VanderWal appear to be despite their battle for time.  "Yeah, we are the same way, and I love those two (Spears and Vander Wal). They are so funny over there, helping each other get through things and learn.  Even though we all understand we are kind of competing, we care about each other already and want to help each other out."

It's not only in the gym that Stafford feels the connection with her Longhorn teammates.  "One thing that is really helping bring many of us together is our Bible Study, led by Emma and Ella (Halter and Swindle). "We've talked a lot about how a lot of us have prayed for a close and united team and we feel like even through our hardships of life we constantly remind one another that God has a plan for us and that's what gives us peace and certainly me peace with my decision (to transfer and attend Texas).

Stafford said there would be a time to tell her whole story and answer everyone's questions, but it's not now, and by the end of our conversation, I could have really cared less about what team she played for.  I had met a talented young female who was doing her best to figure things out and was comfortable where she was and the people she was around, and she was good with that.  In the era of Chat Boards and rumor mills, I felt really good leaving the story right there.  Torrey Stafford is just an imperfect young adult (who happens to be able to jump really high) trying to figure things out, and she is OK right where she is today.  That's Player of the Year-type honesty to me!